Updated : Oct 04, 2019 in Photos


Esther Perel wants married couples to have more sex: she says passion after reading Mating in Captivity, the unnerving book written by the. The Central Paradox of Love: Esther Perel on Reconciling the and writer Esther Perel explores in Mating in Captivity: Unlocking Erotic. Mating in Captivity by Esther Perel, , available at Book Depository with free delivery worldwide.

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I highly recommend this book to everyone, not just matign. I’m not one for self-help books or couple advice, but I was intrigued after that interview.

Review quote “Her advice is refreshingly counterintuitive.

That was more than enough for me to call it quits with this ridiculous book. One drawback is that this book from already feels dated in terms of how it discusses non-monogamy. Drop this book off a pier with cement shoes stars! If you are in any doubt about the impact of long stretches of celibacy on a marriage, Perel will quickly share some sobering, and rather bullying, statistics with you.

Mating in Captivity invites us to explore the paradoxical union of domesticity and sexual desire, and explains what it takes to bring lust home.

Today, as then, neither type are automatically better people than the other because of the type that they are. Sometimes its fear or shame over past sexual experiences. She is regularly sought around the world for her expertise in erotic intelligence, couples and family identity as well as corporate relationships and team collaboration. I was a bit troubled when I got to her brief chapter on non-monogamy. First, like anything else in a relationship, there is a constant tension between connection and differentiation when it comes to sex, the author calls these points of tension the erotic and the domestic.


Go fuck yourself, Perel. Esther Perel, in “mating in captivity: While easy to find humor in chapters explaining how democratic politics have left Eros limp and how the protestant work ethic leaves no room for eroticism, the anecdotal cases kept emerging even when their application felt forced.

It’s the sort of game my mother played in the s. Even mediocre sex can be relaxing. Wise, witty, and as revelatory as it is straightforward, Mating in Captivity is a sensational book that will transform the way you live and love.

Mating in Captivity : Esther Perel :

On different needs from our parents Each child brings an individual resilience to the lottery of life. It is not just a matter of being in the mood; it requires patience and sustained attention.

Fluent in nine languages, she helms a therapy practice in New York City and serves as an organizational consultant for Fortune companies around the world. The Best Books of Yet without an element of uncertainty there is no longing, no anticipation, no frisson.

She applies a social and economic framework to analyze how Americans’ love of personal responsibility or nuclear families can be isolating, or cause us to expect romantic relationships to fill multiple roles that used to be filled by a more community-oriented society. Because the former requires some degree of emotional distance and autonomy that is, of course, anathema to the latter, most couples find themselves tied up in a Gordian knot–either feeling close and safe but sexually muted, or alternatively, sexually alive but emotionally distant and vulnerable.


When a woman complains that she can’t be sexual with her husband after she marries him: Marriage is not the end of romance, it is the beginning.

A child’s game of exoticism and secrets. This transition is not only emotional but biological: Thanks for telling us about the problem. Perel discusses some of the mechanics of how attraction works, why we feel it for some people and not for others, and how it’s often lost as a relationship progresses.

She is right and the tight-buttocked ‘liberals’ are wrong – the divorce rate and lack of ability to talk about sexuality with any erotic wisdom amongst grown persons is proof enough that she has identified a problem that is endemic to contemporary liberal culture.

Mating in Captivity : Unlocking Erotic Intelligence

About Esther Perel Psychotherapist and New York Times bestselling author Esther Perel is recognized as one of today’s most insightful and original voices on modern relationships. And Perel implies this in the introduction.

Jealousy is more suffocating than housework. In America fidelity is sacrosanct and divorce is common. Or, for those select few, polyamory may be the way to go.

Reconciling the Erotic and the Domestic by Esther Perel. A couple of good ones are here: At the same time, we expect our committed relationships to be romantic as well as emotionally and sexually fulfilling.